TV - LOST joke on Kimmel

THIS is fantastic.  Take two minutes out of your day and enjoy. Read more!

TV - LOST joke on Kimmel

THIS is fantastic.  Take three minutes out of your day and enjoy. Read more!

TV - Embedded Commercials

The embedded commercials in television shows are getting to a point that is just pathetic and desperate. I'm trying to decide which is the worst offender - Gossip Girl or Bones.


Gossip Girl

So, Gossip Girl is shamelessly plugging bing.com, that search engine that is trying to compete with Google. Here are some of the things they have done:

1. Shown lingering over the shoulder shots of people looking up information on the internet on bing.com. Mildly annoying, but really not much worse than normal product placement.

2. Concocted a situation where te characters needed to find some information quickly. One says, "We'll just look it up on Bing," or something to that effect and sits down at the computer. Three seconds later after some furious typing, he says, "Done!" That one is pretty bad. I mean, if you cut out the 15 seconds of the show where that happened, I'm pretty sure it would be identical to an actual commercial for bing.

3. In the midst of preparing for a fashion show, with all kinds of people running around trying to get things done, the frazzled designer is asked a question. Her response? "Just bing it." Bing. It. As in, look it up on bing.com. As in, they are trying to replace the phrase "google it" with the phrase "bing it." Now THAT is just pathetic. Epic failure on the part of both Gossip Girl and bing.com. Gossip Girl, because it makes me lose respect for the show - not that I had a lot to begin with (though, don't get me wrong, I love the show). Bing.com, because it just reeks of kid brother syndrome. They are trying to force a square peg into a round hole. It would be like Puffs brand facial tissue trying to get people to call all facial tissue "puffs." Just accept that your competitor's name has become the generic term and move on with convincing people that you have the better product. Don't try to take over the generic term! It's just pathetic, and it's not going to work. That ship has sailed, bing.com. People are not going to start saying, "Bing it," when they mean "look it up on the internet." However, if your search engine is really that great and is superior to Google, maybe one day people will say, "Google it on bing."


Bones

So, Bones has been doing ads for Toyota. Mostly out of the mouth of Angela Montenegro. There have only been two glaring incidents.

1. Angela is driving a Toyota Sienna with another character in the car. The other character asks why Angela drives a mini-van (she's not a mom, so it makes no sense, right?). Angela replies that the Sienna has plenty of room for all her art supplies (do art supplies really take up that much room?) and that she is bad at parallel parking, so she likes the rearview camera. It was so jarring I had to pause it and ask my husband whether what I thought had just happened had in fact just happened. And while I generally like the actress who plays Angela, she is terrible at these little mini-commercials, so if they must keep them on the show, I think they should give them to someone else. Maybe no one else will agree to do them.

2. In last night's episode, Angela and Hodgins are driving in a Prius. Hodgins is driving but Angela is showing him something on a camera, I think. He starts to veer out of his land and the car automatically pulls him back into his lane. He says, "Whoa! What happened!?" Angela helpfully points to a littls screen showing to lane lines and tells Hodgins that the Prius helps you stay in your lane. "It's pretty cool," she says. He agrees that it's cool and does it again, prompting a police office to pull him over and ask if he's been drinking. This incident led to Hodgins and Angela being loked up in a jail cell together for an extended period of time in which they realize that they still love each other and before leaving the jail, they get MARRIED. That's right, an embedded Toyota Prius commercial led to a wedding.

So, which is worse? I really can't decide. Telling someone to "Bing it," is pretty ridiculous, but using an embedded commercial as a lame-ass plot device to lead to a wedding is also pretty much unforgivable. Read more!

TV - What is wrong with me?!

Dear "Glee" and "American Idol" - I wish I knew how to quit you!  Why can't I stop watching these terrible shows?!? Read more for my whiny ramblings and my sad prediction for tonight's Idol.

Read more!

TV and Book - "Justified"

Due to enthusiastic recommendations from the Dwyer's and Damon Lindelof, I decided to catch up with the new show on FX, Justified.  It is super good!  A little procedural, a lot Western, smirky and engaging.  AND it gives me a new TV boyfriend to help with me with my soon-to-be-enacted Sawyer withdrawal and my enduring Don Draper hiatus heartpangs. 

Because I'm a little OCD, I decided I had to read the short story by Elmore Leonard, "Fire in the Hole," from which the show is based before tuning in.    Funny thing - the pilot episode of "Justified" is just about 95% word-for-word the short story.  Seriously!   I've never seen a truer page-to-screen adaption.  So don't feel like you have to read the story to catch any further insight - although it's certainly well written.  It can be found in Leonard's collection of short stories called "When the Women Come Out to Dance."

And as for "Justified" it's on Tuesday nights at 10pm on FX.   As of this post, we're between episode 6 and 7 now of the first season.    5 episodes are kept on Hulu, but as of right now you can still watch the pilot on FX's website. 

Read more!

via @DamonLindelof who I assume is trying to keep the Lost finale in perspective:

The 7 Most Soul-Crushing Series Finales in TV History

Read more!

TV - The End of Lost: Realistic Expectations

There has been a vast outcry regarding my lack of Lost posts so I'm here to placate the masses  (hi Tony!).  Read on!

A lot of people in the blogosphere are super pissy right now about LOST (and a lot of people are with me – really content with how the finale season is playing out.  But, you know, the naysayers are always the loudest).   They want more answers faster and they want every answer to every mythological nugget that has been presented in the past 6 years, and they want the reveals to be utterly mind-blowing. 

I feel a little sorry for these viewers because they just are not going to be satisfied.  Like I said, I am very content with how this season is progressing.  I feel like we’re on a solid path and that I’m going to be at peace with how this show ends.  What keeps me focused and calm?: Realistic expectations.  Here’s what I think is important when considering the answers to Lost:

The answers are going to be kind of vague:

A lot of the naysayers are going to be left unsatisfied because they don’t appreciate the answers they’re given.  They want every element of every mystery explained, leaving no room for drawing our own viewer conclusions.

Take The Numbers: we’ve learned that each of the candidates for who will take over Jacob’s jobbie have been assigned a number.  The numbers correspond to the degrees on the lighthouse dial that show the candidates’ off-Island homelands (I think).   For me, this is good enough.   Why these particular numbers and how did Jacob come up with them?  Well, I’m curious as to how Jacob found the castaways and decided they warranted touching, but I don’t care why Hugo is #8 and not #23.  For some aspects, you’re going to have to use your imagination.  And thank goodness for that, because it’s those kinds of brain-teasers that keep the show alive after it’s concluded. 

I earnestly believe that people who want more explained for them regarding the mythology of the show are going to have the opportunity to learn more in another medium.  (See the game “The Lost Experience” illustrating how the numbers are linked to “The Valenzetti Equation” and The Dharama Initative.)  There is also “Lost University” (a blue-ray educational experience) and the creators have deemed both of these other forums canon.  And I totally think a post-Lost graphic novel explaining more aspects of the mythology (not the character stories) is a distinct possibility.  But as for hashing out relevant physics theorems, Greek mythology, and Egyptian hieroglyphics decoding- it just isn’t going to happen on network television.

The answers are going to be accessible:

This may seem like a weird statement, considering we’re talking about a show involving time-travel, parallel universes, and smoke monsters.  But what I mean is that whatever this show is about is going to be able to be explained over coffee.  You’re not going to need a calculator or a master’s degree or to have to read a thousand and ten lostpedia entries in order to grasp it all. 

One of my favorite lost bloggers, Entertainment Weekly’s “Doc” Jensen, has totally melted his brain coming up with the most cockamamie theories and I hope he’s having fun because it’s just totally coo-coo-clock rambling.   He dedicated a 10-page column recently to a theory that the Smoke Monster / Man in Black is actually the embodiment of all the souls of the people who have died on the Island – with Juliet and Daniel Faraday’s minds primarily driving his ship.  What?!  I think it’s really obvious that the MIB is a person – a special person – but a person with human motivations.  Look at the history of Richard Alpert: his narrative is full of mythology and fantasy, but it still is a narrative based on emotions, not science fiction.  I know the answers to Lost aren’t going to be simple, or easy to explain to someone who never saw the show, but I honestly believe it’s going to be able to be boiled down to a one-pager.  Does that make sense?  Is it irony that I can’t clearly explain my theory that Lost will be able to be clearly explained?

The answers are going to be “schmoopy”:

In our house, schmoopy means gushy.  Sentimental and fluffy, in a sense.  Maybe a little corny.  Think about all of the talk in “Harry Potter” about how Voldemort could be beaten because he never knew truelove.  Or all of Battlestar Gallactica’s talk about God and the dangers of human decadence.   It’s good stuff, but it’s also a little cornball.   I’m expecting this when it comes to Lost’s conclusion.  At some point I think there’s going to be a speech regarding the importance of love and acceptance, or salvation, or trusting fate – something like that. And I’m glad I’m prepared, because those types of speeches can be a little off-putting when you’re not in the right headspace.

This is a story about characters.  It is not a story about an Island where lots of crazy scientific stuff is happening. I think with each introduction of another wacky element to the Island (electromagnetism, etc…) there were viewers who were more married to the mythology than to the characters, and they are going to have their hearts broken.  These are the people who thought the smoke monster was nanobots.  It’s not nanobots, nerds!  It’s an angry dude! 

Take a look at this paragraph from a previous post I wrote comparing Lost to Stephen King's "The Stand":

I would say the main thing I learned about Lost after reading this book is that Team Darlton share King's sentiment that mythology should only be the background for a story about character-development. "The Stand" ended with a solid understanding that the characters faced their faults and gained peace in their sense-of-self. They were presented with opportunities to receive redemption, and those that embraced them gained comfort. The conclusion did not address any of the questions that arose from the mythological experiences. Why were these people the survivors? Who exactly are Mother Abigail and Randall Flagg? We have a sense at the answers, but much much much is left to interpretation. I fear Lost will end in a similar fashion, but I also think the fan involvement with the show will shape it in such a way that more questions will be answered than would be if King was at the helm.

I like that past-Jenna.  She’s smart. 

So, bottom-line (too late I know) is that if you think Lost is going to end with a man in a white lab-coat conducting a two-hour long Power Point presentation explaining every last exhaustive detail – I truly hope you’re wrong.  It’s going to end, it’s going to be about humanity – not science – and we’re going to be left to our own imaginations when it comes to connecting some of the dots.  Thank goodness for that because I like using my brain, and it’s a way to keep the show alive after it’s all over. 

We can just hope that they conclude the basic, essential story-elements and we’re not left completely on our own to imagine an ending – like The Sopranos.   “Don’t stah- BLACK SCREEN.”  

Read more!