Any talk about the Twilight books being "potato-chip literature" can now be thrown out the window. I can't remember if "The Da Vinci Code" was written this incredibly poorly, but let me assure you that there have been "Choose Your Own Adventure" books with more linguistic nuance than Brown's latest page-turner. That being said, "The Lost Symbol" takes the reader on a fun and exciting journey into the real-life world of American Freemasons and Noetic Science.
You don't watch the "National Treasure" movies for the method-acting, and you don't read Dan Brown to build your literary chops. You do it for fun! And while at the same time you might find your brain getting squishy from reading the phrase So-and-So "did a double-take" or "it's so obvious! How could we not have seen it before?" over and over again, or when you realize that that man has been described as "elegant" enough times that you have to assume he's actually a swan, the book actually does teach you a little about American History.
Another interesting note about this book... I can't help but wonder if Dan Brown is throwing a middle-finger at the production studios trying to turn this into another blockbuster movie. There are a lot of aspects to this thriller that will make it difficult to translate to screen. For one, we need to be shocked about the powerful members in our society who are actually Freemasons, and that's going to be hard to do in a short period of time without actually casting prominent political figures. There's also a weirdo death and resurrection scene and perhaps most difficult for a movie adaptation, one of the most exciting chase scenes takes place in absolute pitch-black darkness. 10 minutes of looking at a black screen might make for a strange cinematic experience...
Read more!
Showing posts with label twilight. Show all posts
Showing posts with label twilight. Show all posts
Thursday, October 15, 2009
Saturday, September 19, 2009
Important Issue #1: Male Boob Equivalent
Women have butts and so do men. Full-frontal shots of pubic areas carry the same "wow" factor regardless of sex. But what packs the same punch as a full frontal boob-shot when men are involved? Yes, I know that men have nipples and chests, but those are hardly as sexualized as the female breasts.
Although this area could be found on the female form as well, my vote is for the pelvic indentations found on the male lower abdomen, usually accompanied by some sort of "treasure trail," as illustrated within the yellow box below. I anxiously await your thoughts on this important issue!
Friday, July 17, 2009
Books - Twilght Series Part Two
We've already discussed the issues in this series regarding abusive boyfriends and lousy writing. Putting both of those aside, it's time to discuss the weirdness that is the fourth book, "Breaking Dawn." Read on for a spoiler-heavy discussion.
The first three books fit together in a nice little trio. In the first book, Bella falls in love with Edward. In the second, she falls for Jacob. In the third, she makes her choice. And even though there are plenty of adventures and mythological backstories that are shared in these books, this love-triangle is pretty much what they are about.
So with the love-triangle seemingly resolved at the end of "Eclipse," what were we to expect for the fourth book? If you guessed "something bizarre," then you win! In this book not only does Meyer dedicate a whole third of the book to a change-up in narrator, she also takes on a much darker tone. Now there are blood-thirsty vampire babies! Delicious sippy-cups of O-negative! And a birth story that just might encourage the most eager of tween readers to keep their thighs together, even if Edward creeps along.
This book would make a lot more sense if it came along some 5 years after "Eclipse" was released and was the first in a new "So Bella's a Vampire" series.
However, I've got to admit: I liked it the best out of the series. I know Metta's going to slug me in the arm for saying that, but although I realize it is very different from the first three, I like it... maybe even because of the differences. It was so bizarre I was smiling way more than I did while reading any of the previous books, and I liked those, too.
Now don't get me wrong here: this book is still laughably offensive in its treatment towards Bella, and the writing stylings haven't improved in the slightest. There's also the fact that everything gets wrapped up in the prettiest of pretty packages, saving perhaps for the fact that poor Jacob will never be able to "get with" the love of his life (as she will never develop past a 7 year old's physique). But as I had already embraced most of these issues throughout my journey reading the first three books, I was along for the ride by the time I cracked "Breaking Dawn."
The real question is: how the heck are they going to make this into a movie? The first two books should adapt easily enough, but once you throw in telepathic wolves and boys who grow larger every time you see them you're getting tricky. Then with "Breaking Dawn" you have not just the wolves, but also the unsightly birthing scene, the incredible transformation in Bella's appearance, and the fact that the newborn baby will develop to look like a 5 year old by the time the books ends.
So that should be interesting! Anyway, I'm anxiously awaiting Metta's comments because I know she was not a fan of this fourth book in a major way. Perhaps my experience was enhanced by the fact I was spoiled to the fact that Bella would end up with Edward, and that she would have her baby delivered traumatically by edward biting through her uterus. Also - maybe there is something to be said that I read all four books in the course of 20 days? We shall see.
Of course - I think blog readers are used to the fact that Metta and I sometimes come down on different sides. She is a Jacob, I am an Edward. She is a Jack, I am a Sawyer. But I love her a lot anyways because that's just how awesome she is.
Read more!
The first three books fit together in a nice little trio. In the first book, Bella falls in love with Edward. In the second, she falls for Jacob. In the third, she makes her choice. And even though there are plenty of adventures and mythological backstories that are shared in these books, this love-triangle is pretty much what they are about.
So with the love-triangle seemingly resolved at the end of "Eclipse," what were we to expect for the fourth book? If you guessed "something bizarre," then you win! In this book not only does Meyer dedicate a whole third of the book to a change-up in narrator, she also takes on a much darker tone. Now there are blood-thirsty vampire babies! Delicious sippy-cups of O-negative! And a birth story that just might encourage the most eager of tween readers to keep their thighs together, even if Edward creeps along.
This book would make a lot more sense if it came along some 5 years after "Eclipse" was released and was the first in a new "So Bella's a Vampire" series.
However, I've got to admit: I liked it the best out of the series. I know Metta's going to slug me in the arm for saying that, but although I realize it is very different from the first three, I like it... maybe even because of the differences. It was so bizarre I was smiling way more than I did while reading any of the previous books, and I liked those, too.
Now don't get me wrong here: this book is still laughably offensive in its treatment towards Bella, and the writing stylings haven't improved in the slightest. There's also the fact that everything gets wrapped up in the prettiest of pretty packages, saving perhaps for the fact that poor Jacob will never be able to "get with" the love of his life (as she will never develop past a 7 year old's physique). But as I had already embraced most of these issues throughout my journey reading the first three books, I was along for the ride by the time I cracked "Breaking Dawn."
The real question is: how the heck are they going to make this into a movie? The first two books should adapt easily enough, but once you throw in telepathic wolves and boys who grow larger every time you see them you're getting tricky. Then with "Breaking Dawn" you have not just the wolves, but also the unsightly birthing scene, the incredible transformation in Bella's appearance, and the fact that the newborn baby will develop to look like a 5 year old by the time the books ends.
So that should be interesting! Anyway, I'm anxiously awaiting Metta's comments because I know she was not a fan of this fourth book in a major way. Perhaps my experience was enhanced by the fact I was spoiled to the fact that Bella would end up with Edward, and that she would have her baby delivered traumatically by edward biting through her uterus. Also - maybe there is something to be said that I read all four books in the course of 20 days? We shall see.
Of course - I think blog readers are used to the fact that Metta and I sometimes come down on different sides. She is a Jacob, I am an Edward. She is a Jack, I am a Sawyer. But I love her a lot anyways because that's just how awesome she is.
Read more!
Wednesday, July 8, 2009
Books - Twilght Series
For fear of being out of touch, I have started reading the “Twilight” series by Stephenie Meyer. I have read the first book and am into the second. My husband has even joined the fun, having already finished “Twilight” and “New Moon” (a family that reads young adult vampire romance stories stays together, right?). Although I haven’t finished the entire series, I thought I’d go ahead and start blogging about these books now.
Most of the buzz I’ve heard about this series is that it sets up unrealistic romance expectations for the young female readers. Man, that’s for sure! But let’s broaden up this discussion to whether you’d be okay with your hypothetical 12 year-old daughter getting sucked up into Meyer’s smoldering world of vampires.
First off, I’m always going to be in favor of any book that gets young adults passionate about reading. So much better than a video game or reality TV show for their supple brains!
However, as an avid reader myself, I don’t think I’d be able to help myself but be disappointed in the lack of literary merit these books bring to the table. Sure - it is a successful piece of escapist literature if droves of people go out and buy the books and read them ravenously. However, who says escapist literature can’t have complex sentence structures? Or better-developed characters and mythologies? I know that these books are supposed to be written from the perspective of a 17 and counting year-old girl, but she is also supposed to be intelligent. How come she keeps awkwardly forcing nouns into adverbs? I distinctly remember Bella describing her day as “nightmarish.”
And Bella herself isn’t much more than a “Mary Sue” character, to borrow a phrase from the world of fan fiction. Through Bella, we live a fantasy of being swept off our feet by a beautiful boy… and better yet we get to choose this handsome devil over scores of other eligible bachelors, because every single male Bella meets fancies her. But Bella herself is short-changed of real-depth. We know she is clumsy (all the better for getting saved!) and we know she sacrifices hers safety and sanity for those she loves (dating a dude who kind of wants to kill her, hanging with his family of fellow vamps, and even the fact that she gave up her entire teenage life in order to give her mom some space to get jiggy with a minor-leaguer).
But literary criticism aside, let’s get down to the nitty-gritty with our issues of feminism and saving our beloved hypothetical teenage daughter from a world of romantic disillusionment. Surely this book presents a scary idea for teenage love: Edward likes to creep into Bella’s home without permission and watch her sleep. He is possessive and invades her privacy. He spies on her friends to get closer to her. He has unpredictable mood-swings and some major anger issues. And Bella is nothing but flattered by his gestures and treasures his every broody characteristic. Is this the sort-of relationship we’d like to see our daughter be a part of? Surely not- it’s abusive! However, our daughter is not reading an instruction manual on how to be a teenager in love. She’s reading a piece of fiction, and we’ve raised her better than for her to take any one piece of media and hold it as the ultimate guide for how to live a life.
And afterall, isn’t this essentially the story of Romeo and Juliet? There’s a love that forces the young couple (Juliet’s 15, no?) to forsake their families and their safety in order to be together? However, at least then our daughter would be reading Shakespeare.
So for all the hub-bub out there about this book being bad for its female readers, I’m going to go ahead and vote “nay.” We can’t blame Meyer for our daughter’s decision to date abusive weirdos- that’s a parental failure. More than likely Meyer is doing us a favor: setting our daughters up with high enough expectations that they won’t waste their time dating immature high-school jocks, saving themselves for more worthy suitors in college.
And just in case you really do have a high-school daughter reading these books, you might just want to show her THIS VIDEO MASHUP showing us in a nicely produced 6 minute movie how Buffy would react to Edward’s stalking.
Read more!
Most of the buzz I’ve heard about this series is that it sets up unrealistic romance expectations for the young female readers. Man, that’s for sure! But let’s broaden up this discussion to whether you’d be okay with your hypothetical 12 year-old daughter getting sucked up into Meyer’s smoldering world of vampires.
First off, I’m always going to be in favor of any book that gets young adults passionate about reading. So much better than a video game or reality TV show for their supple brains!
However, as an avid reader myself, I don’t think I’d be able to help myself but be disappointed in the lack of literary merit these books bring to the table. Sure - it is a successful piece of escapist literature if droves of people go out and buy the books and read them ravenously. However, who says escapist literature can’t have complex sentence structures? Or better-developed characters and mythologies? I know that these books are supposed to be written from the perspective of a 17 and counting year-old girl, but she is also supposed to be intelligent. How come she keeps awkwardly forcing nouns into adverbs? I distinctly remember Bella describing her day as “nightmarish.”
And Bella herself isn’t much more than a “Mary Sue” character, to borrow a phrase from the world of fan fiction. Through Bella, we live a fantasy of being swept off our feet by a beautiful boy… and better yet we get to choose this handsome devil over scores of other eligible bachelors, because every single male Bella meets fancies her. But Bella herself is short-changed of real-depth. We know she is clumsy (all the better for getting saved!) and we know she sacrifices hers safety and sanity for those she loves (dating a dude who kind of wants to kill her, hanging with his family of fellow vamps, and even the fact that she gave up her entire teenage life in order to give her mom some space to get jiggy with a minor-leaguer).
But literary criticism aside, let’s get down to the nitty-gritty with our issues of feminism and saving our beloved hypothetical teenage daughter from a world of romantic disillusionment. Surely this book presents a scary idea for teenage love: Edward likes to creep into Bella’s home without permission and watch her sleep. He is possessive and invades her privacy. He spies on her friends to get closer to her. He has unpredictable mood-swings and some major anger issues. And Bella is nothing but flattered by his gestures and treasures his every broody characteristic. Is this the sort-of relationship we’d like to see our daughter be a part of? Surely not- it’s abusive! However, our daughter is not reading an instruction manual on how to be a teenager in love. She’s reading a piece of fiction, and we’ve raised her better than for her to take any one piece of media and hold it as the ultimate guide for how to live a life.
And afterall, isn’t this essentially the story of Romeo and Juliet? There’s a love that forces the young couple (Juliet’s 15, no?) to forsake their families and their safety in order to be together? However, at least then our daughter would be reading Shakespeare.
So for all the hub-bub out there about this book being bad for its female readers, I’m going to go ahead and vote “nay.” We can’t blame Meyer for our daughter’s decision to date abusive weirdos- that’s a parental failure. More than likely Meyer is doing us a favor: setting our daughters up with high enough expectations that they won’t waste their time dating immature high-school jocks, saving themselves for more worthy suitors in college.
And just in case you really do have a high-school daughter reading these books, you might just want to show her THIS VIDEO MASHUP showing us in a nicely produced 6 minute movie how Buffy would react to Edward’s stalking.
Read more!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
